Mother’s Day is celebrated in some form in more than 40 countries across the world. It was created to honor mothers and motherhood. On Mother’s Day, the mother figure is given love, respect, and acknowledgement through celebration and gifts. In some traditions, wearing a pink or red carnation or flower represents a mother who is deceased. Wearing a white flower signals a mother who is still living. Mother’s Day can be a joyous celebration if your mother or mother figure was a positive role model. However, it can also be a sad reminder for those with an absent or abusive mother.
Each year, I feel conflicted when Mother’s Day approaches. I enjoy the day as a mother. However, I dread it as a daughter. The commercials for brunches and dinners start days ahead. I see advertisements for cards, flowers, and gifts to give to loving mothers. It seems that every commercial is showing smiling happy women and their families. But, I think of my mother and our fractured relationship. How abusive and unstable my childhood was. My birth mother was unprepared to be a mother both mentally and financially.
There are too many children born to unprepared mothers. Additionally, there are too many born to “mothers” who reject or abuse their children. Commercials ignore these children. Mother’s Day is intended to be a day of celebration. However, there aren’t enough commercials about active and positive parenting during Mother’s Day. Shout out to the good mothers, grandmothers, aunties, great-aunties, and all the women who have stepped up to fill the gaps of lost mothers. Happy Mother’s Day.